Besides a description as the dissolution of marriage, divorce is explained in the dictionary as the separation between things that should go together. For many people who experience the termination of their marriage, divorce can be quite a shock. Part of that shock may be the realization that they were wrong when they married and were so sure they belonged together.
Some friends who have been divorced say that they were surprised at their feeling of failure. However, having once been divorced myself, my reaction was different from the people with whom I have discussed it. Thoughts of ending the marriage and gaining freedom were in my mind for years before I was finally able to express them to my husband. Therefore, when the conversation took place, there was no shock on my part. The shock was his.
My feelings of failure were due to the belief that I should have realized before we even married that my husband and I did not belong together. We could have saved our families and ourselves a lot of agony and money if we had known this fact before we tied the knot.
We had no children so the situation might have been a little different from those divorced couples who did. The fact that there were no children involved may have influenced my feelings. So rather than a sense of failure and shock, I actually felt relief when it was finally over.
I have gathered from many conversations with friends who have children and are divorced that the separation is tougher on the kids than on the couple. That is because divorce significantly impacts the children who are not involved in that decision.
With the exception of couples who marry for financial or immigration purposes, most people who decide to marry do so because they are sure they will be together for the rest of their lives. In reality, until you have lived together, you do not know if you belong together. As a matter of fact, my mother used to say you never actually know a person until you work or live with them.
After reading the divorce description in the dictionary, I do believe that one reason for divorce is that some people probably marry the one person they feel they go together with. Then, after living together, maybe even having children together, they find that they do not go together. Then they divorce. - 15784
Some friends who have been divorced say that they were surprised at their feeling of failure. However, having once been divorced myself, my reaction was different from the people with whom I have discussed it. Thoughts of ending the marriage and gaining freedom were in my mind for years before I was finally able to express them to my husband. Therefore, when the conversation took place, there was no shock on my part. The shock was his.
My feelings of failure were due to the belief that I should have realized before we even married that my husband and I did not belong together. We could have saved our families and ourselves a lot of agony and money if we had known this fact before we tied the knot.
We had no children so the situation might have been a little different from those divorced couples who did. The fact that there were no children involved may have influenced my feelings. So rather than a sense of failure and shock, I actually felt relief when it was finally over.
I have gathered from many conversations with friends who have children and are divorced that the separation is tougher on the kids than on the couple. That is because divorce significantly impacts the children who are not involved in that decision.
With the exception of couples who marry for financial or immigration purposes, most people who decide to marry do so because they are sure they will be together for the rest of their lives. In reality, until you have lived together, you do not know if you belong together. As a matter of fact, my mother used to say you never actually know a person until you work or live with them.
After reading the divorce description in the dictionary, I do believe that one reason for divorce is that some people probably marry the one person they feel they go together with. Then, after living together, maybe even having children together, they find that they do not go together. Then they divorce. - 15784
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