I have had this happen before. You might have too. I'm out looking to hook up, and I meet a really aggressive woman, dressed to the nines, and she's smoking hot. We're flirting like crazy. It seems like fun times are ahead when you notice a little sparkle on her finger.
It's her wedding ring.
Questions start swirling in my head, but I primarily want to know what she is thinking, being married and acting like this.
This can and will happen though. Why do married people flirt? From what information I've gathered, it normally comes down to boredom and neglect, and with latter, revenge is often the motive.
Other times, the woman feels safe playing around with the risk, because she knows if things go too far, she can point at her ring, feign innocence and say "sorry, I'm married!" It can be annoying as hell, no doubt.
Now, I don't think I have to go into detail about what a pissed off husband can do. I think everyone knows full well the risks. Even with some of the advice I'll give in the article later, there will still be some risk involved. Be cautious first.
The next question comes down to the moral issue of it. Some guys don't care who they are screwing around with. Others apply the golden rule - I wouldn't want it done to me, so I don't do it to others. I won't tell you which morality to uphold, that's up to you. Personally, I don't deal with the situation, because I have an abundance of beautiful single women in my life.
That aside, if you DO decide to pursue a married woman, there are a few things you should be ready for. Here's what they are, and how to handle any issues that arise.
First, you are dealing with a person who isn't thinking in terms of fairness. She is putting herself first. Her husband wasn't considered in the equation. Do you think you will be? It's doubtful.
Be upfront with her about it, right off the bat. Sure, it could blow the whole situation, but that might be inevitable anyhow. This way you can just cut to the chase.
Just ask her what is with the ring. Very simply. If you are giving her the impression that you do NOT care either way, then she should be forthcoming and the situation will take a direction.
From there, you can gauge her answers. If she is treating you like a "safe flirt", then it will probably be over then. She'll find a way to withdraw from the whole thing. That's fine, you saved yourself some time.
If it goes past that, then you'll need to pay some attention to what she's saying to you. She might ask if it matters to you. Obviously, if it's gotten to this point, it doesn't. Let her know, but also ask where it is going to go.
Some women might balk there too. You are eliminating some of the risk of the game for her, and that can be fun. It's also forcing her to look directly at what she's doing. Believe me though, it's for the better.
If things continue, generally I'd say you are in. Just keep your eyes peeled. Watch for some guy who is staring at you, etc.
I'd also recommend taking the time to objectively analyze the situation. Is she secretive? Is she blabbering about how much she hates her husband? Try to get a general idea of WHY she's doing this.
All the above is about safety measures. After that, if things are still going, I'd recommend keeping it to a quick fling. Odds are, it's not going anywhere anyhow.
There is a chance she'll reconcile. That means the relationship is probably done. And if she gets conscious of the whole thing, you might find yourself in the crosshairs of the angry husband. The best bet is to have as little attachment to her as possible. In all ways. You don't want her knowing where you live, who you hang out with, etc.. Careful if the pickup spot was a regular hangout for you. You might have to quit going there.
Last thing to remember: Do NOT get emotionally attached. These things rarely end well. Keep your hide on your body, chalk it up, and move on. If you don't, it'll probably end in a physical situation. You could be the toughest guy in the world, but I don't recommend getting into a physical situation. It's never worth it.
It sounds like a lot to remember, but you need to know this. It's more important, at the end of the day, to be breathing, than it is to score a fling. - 15784
It's her wedding ring.
Questions start swirling in my head, but I primarily want to know what she is thinking, being married and acting like this.
This can and will happen though. Why do married people flirt? From what information I've gathered, it normally comes down to boredom and neglect, and with latter, revenge is often the motive.
Other times, the woman feels safe playing around with the risk, because she knows if things go too far, she can point at her ring, feign innocence and say "sorry, I'm married!" It can be annoying as hell, no doubt.
Now, I don't think I have to go into detail about what a pissed off husband can do. I think everyone knows full well the risks. Even with some of the advice I'll give in the article later, there will still be some risk involved. Be cautious first.
The next question comes down to the moral issue of it. Some guys don't care who they are screwing around with. Others apply the golden rule - I wouldn't want it done to me, so I don't do it to others. I won't tell you which morality to uphold, that's up to you. Personally, I don't deal with the situation, because I have an abundance of beautiful single women in my life.
That aside, if you DO decide to pursue a married woman, there are a few things you should be ready for. Here's what they are, and how to handle any issues that arise.
First, you are dealing with a person who isn't thinking in terms of fairness. She is putting herself first. Her husband wasn't considered in the equation. Do you think you will be? It's doubtful.
Be upfront with her about it, right off the bat. Sure, it could blow the whole situation, but that might be inevitable anyhow. This way you can just cut to the chase.
Just ask her what is with the ring. Very simply. If you are giving her the impression that you do NOT care either way, then she should be forthcoming and the situation will take a direction.
From there, you can gauge her answers. If she is treating you like a "safe flirt", then it will probably be over then. She'll find a way to withdraw from the whole thing. That's fine, you saved yourself some time.
If it goes past that, then you'll need to pay some attention to what she's saying to you. She might ask if it matters to you. Obviously, if it's gotten to this point, it doesn't. Let her know, but also ask where it is going to go.
Some women might balk there too. You are eliminating some of the risk of the game for her, and that can be fun. It's also forcing her to look directly at what she's doing. Believe me though, it's for the better.
If things continue, generally I'd say you are in. Just keep your eyes peeled. Watch for some guy who is staring at you, etc.
I'd also recommend taking the time to objectively analyze the situation. Is she secretive? Is she blabbering about how much she hates her husband? Try to get a general idea of WHY she's doing this.
All the above is about safety measures. After that, if things are still going, I'd recommend keeping it to a quick fling. Odds are, it's not going anywhere anyhow.
There is a chance she'll reconcile. That means the relationship is probably done. And if she gets conscious of the whole thing, you might find yourself in the crosshairs of the angry husband. The best bet is to have as little attachment to her as possible. In all ways. You don't want her knowing where you live, who you hang out with, etc.. Careful if the pickup spot was a regular hangout for you. You might have to quit going there.
Last thing to remember: Do NOT get emotionally attached. These things rarely end well. Keep your hide on your body, chalk it up, and move on. If you don't, it'll probably end in a physical situation. You could be the toughest guy in the world, but I don't recommend getting into a physical situation. It's never worth it.
It sounds like a lot to remember, but you need to know this. It's more important, at the end of the day, to be breathing, than it is to score a fling. - 15784
About the Author:
Joseph Matthews has been instructing guys how to meet women since 2004, and is widely recognized as an expert in the field of confidence building and dating advice. If you want to discover more about how to meet women, check out his free newsletter.